Which Way is Within

Written by:
Michael D. May

I give myself up

to whatever the moment brings.

I know I am going to die,

and I have nothing left to hold on to:

no illusions in my mind,

no resistances in my body.

I do not think about my actions;

they flow from the core of my being.

I hold nothing back from life;

therefore I am ready for death,

as I am ready for sleep

after a good day's work.

  • Lao Tzu


Adapted from: Mitchell, Stephen, trans, Tao Te Ching: Lao Tzu, Frances Lincoln Limited, London, 1999, #50.


As a teenager seeking to discover the meaning of life, I would burn some incense, light a candle, play some classical background music, and sit in the darkness of my room attempting to find my center and Truth in the quiet.


Today, I skip the incense, the candle, and the music.


As a teenager, I was attempting to connect with a place that didnt exist. I still am.


I have always wondered, Where I might find the core of my being to which Lao Tzu refers


I have always wondered, Where is the interior life


Which way is Within


Where is Within


This may seem like a silly thing to point out, but our interior life happens within our bodies.


Early in life most of us begin the unhealthy practice of attempting to experience life outside of our bodies. We attempt to orient ourselves by what is occurring out there; in what other people are doing, in what other people are thinking, in what other people are saying, in the news, there on the TV, in the vacation we are going to take next summer, and in the package that is coming in tomorrows mail. But life doesnt happen out there; it never does, it never has, and it never will. Within this interior world we decide if we are going to experience our experience or in futility try to live out there.

The Interior Life is a world of sights and sounds and symbols and songs and stories and images and myths and rituals and dreams and fantasies. It is like every adventure movie you have ever seen except more exciting. It is like every horror film you have ever seen but scarier. It is like every romance novel you have ever read but more passionate, juicier, more personal, and more intimate.


The Interior Life includes every memory of every event and every encounter and every relationship of your entire life especially all the ones you think youve forgotten. The Interior Life includes every thought and every opinion and every judgment that has ever moved through your being.


It includes every wish and every hope and every love and every romance you have ever held in your heart.


The Interior Life includes every regret, every disappointment, every trauma, every hurt, every violation, every loneliness; every scar through every moment. It includes every fear and every dread; real or imagined, until now.


Finally, the Interior Life, at a depth level, includes states of being much deeper than thought or emotion.


All these elements together present a Palette of Freedom from which we daily paint the picture of our lives; from which we write the script of the drama we enact upon lifes stage.


This is the Interior Life.


But which way is Within Where is the core of my being


I am pretty certain the core of my being it is not in my head. I spent a lot of years checking it out. I can tell you, it is not there. Understand me correctly, this head can be an instrument to help you get there, but it is not the place. It is a vehicle, and at the end of the ride you have to get out of it and leave it behind. It is not capable of connecting with the deep places.


Isnt it interesting that 4 of the 5 senses are primarily centered in the head! Yet, the flow of life is centered somewhere else in the core of ones body. This core is the within place out of our heads, as we seek a connecting point with the One who lives beyond time and space.


I am also pretty certain this core I am seeking is not here in my heart; as powerful as my feelings are. I have spent a lot of years lost in this one. The feelings are ever-changing guides; here in this moment and gone the next. You will not find your True Guide there. We have to go deeper.


We have to go deeper to a place that does not exist but is more real than anything else.


So where is this Still Point Where is this place within Where is this content-less place If you have surgery to have it identified or removed, you will not find it. It does not exist. But, it is there. It is a no-place place.


The deep-people experts say that this connecting point is somewhere behind the belly button. But, who are they And do they really know. Hey, I know who knows! You know. You know where that quiet Still Point is. And you can find it any time you wish.


Now is always a good time to connect again.



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